Devil In Disguise
by afrit357
Summary: Angel fell in love with Stitch and everyone thinks that because of it she is a reformed experiment. They are about to learn that falling in love is not the same thing as turning good. Pic by ss2sonic.
1. Not Quite An Angel

**Story 1, Chapter 1: Devil In Disguise**

Nani pounded mercilessly on the bathroom door even though she was halfway certain her cries would be drowned out by the sound of water pounding on the plastic floor of the tub. Nani rubbed her eyes as they made their usual stubborn effort to shut closed after waking in the early hours of the morning before having her first taste of the caffeinated nectar of the gods. "Lilo, we talked about this! You take your shower before bed and I take mine before work! We have a system!" Hearing no response her patience, already frayed from being awoken by an obnoxious alarm-in the middle of a nice dream involving chocolate, whipped cream, and David -was pushed to its limits and she kicked open the door. Or tried anyway as the door opened right in mid kick leaving Nani flustered and trying to catch her balance as her right heel slipped on the bathroom tile only managing to stop just before doing a complete split. Nani rubbed her sore thighs as she regained her proper footing. She glanced forward to see a familiar shaped experiment "oh hey, Stitch, I…" she trailed off. It wasn't the fur color that tipped off her sleep deprived mind, it wasn't the antennae which she was vaguely aware were over twice the size of Stitch's antennae and he only rarely showed them anyway. No what tipped Nani off to the true nature of the experiment residing in her bathroom was the foam of toothpaste. Nani snapped into her momma bear mode because even if she and Stitch weren't terribly close and had a tendency to argue and fight whenever the subject of hygiene (or rather Stitch's lack thereof) came up he was still ohana. "Okay, you're not fooling anyone with that disguise, whoever-you-are, everyone here knows Stitch wouldn't be caught dead brushing his teeth!" With the clanging of plastic shower curtains on the stainless steel bar that held them the shower curtain opened to reveal the aforementioned fuzzball dripping wet with his fur matted from the water, he himself held aloft a toothbrush with the tell-tale foam dripping from the corners of his mouth. This one could not be anyone else but Stitch even if everything in front of Nani defied the expectations of rational minds. "Lilo! I think Stitch is multiplying!"

After Lilo groggily made her way downstairs after being rudely awakened, she explained everything, "This is Angel, you didn't see her when she was first here 'cause you were working overtime."

"But why does she look like a clone of Stitch?" Nani asked hands outstretched to the heavens in exasperation.

"That's really more Jumba's thing, you'd have to ask him."

"Okay but what's her power? Making mule-headed experiments practice bathing and teeth brushing?" Stitch mumbled something in his weird alien language while glaring at Nani.

"No, Jumba didn't say anything about performing miracles just turning experiments evil."

Stitch stood defiant, "Naga du meesh ma!" His defense was, however eloquent and impassioned in his native tongue, completely lost on the humans who just shrugged.

Nani glanced at Angel approvingly, "okay you gotta let me in on your secret, the last time we tried to get Stitch to bathe he ate the curtains."

Angel smiled sweetly, "bata fip boocheeboo stara noctu." Noticing the look of confusion on their faces Angel decided a more hands on approach was necessary to demonstrate her point so she cupped Stitch's face with her hands, stared deeply into his eyes, and when his head turned sufficiently red she said, "boocheeboo, water ja biy, ana." Stitch unthinkingly fetched a glass of water complete with miniature umbrella that Nani was certain she never saw in the house before that day. Angel sipped deliberately from the cup, Stitch never failing to keep his gaze on her. Nani suddenly nodded her head as she remembered some of the crazy, silly, and ultimately profoundly sweet gestures David would occasionally do for her, "I guess love-struck men are the same no matter the species." Lilo, however, was far more interested in returning to bed since she slept in on the weekends and so said, "welp, mystery solved…I guess" she waved her hand in front of Stitch's face but as if a spell was on him Stitch didn't even blink. "Creepy, he's like a wasp-mummy love zombie!"

"Yeah, totally unlike a certain someone I know who doesn't move or change expressions for minutes on end while she daydreams about a certain boy."

Lilo rolled her eyes, "I'm not THAT bad."

Nani smirked and whispered into Lilo's ear, "Keoni." Lilo suddenly imagined herself and a boy just slightly taller than her in a bright, blue shirt and brown shorts with fiery red hair and chestnut eyes. The two of them sat idly on a hammock as the sun drifted beneath the waves occasionally sipping from a milkshake with two straws. Keoni looked deep into Lilo's eyes and slowly moved forward, her heart racing as the distance between them shortened and finally he spoke, "One minute." Lilo's fantasy came to an abrupt end and when she gazed upon reality she discovered Nani standing over her with that absolutely infuriating smirk that said "I told you so". Lilo begrudgingly accepted defeat and turned to see Stitch fanning Angel with a branch from a pineapple tree. Her look turned into befuddlement, "when did he get that?"

"No idea. The little guy moves fast when no one's looking. Anyway, I was so not looking forward to giving Stitch his monthly bath tomorrow," she grumbled under her breath, "though I could have sworn it was your turn," her voice returned to normal volume, "so it's nice to see the little guy with a positive influence for once."

"Hey! I'm a positive influence!" Lilo protested.

"Remember that time that you tried to make mud pies out of real mud and you filled up the fridge and freezer with them?"

"Okay maybe I'm not that good."

"Buck up, Stitch is happy, I'm happy, and hopefully we won't have to replace the bath tub and showerhead 6 times a year and we'll save so much money now that Stitch doesn't just eat the toothbrushes." Nani gave Lilo a hug as she departed the house later that day a smile on her lips and springs in her steps as she thought, _no more of Stitch's nasty breath, no more funky odor after two weeks without a bath, all we'll have to worry about is the visit to the vet and what to do when they have a litter of pups_. Her step lost a little of its spring after that last one. _A litter of pups_. Her smile faded. _Litter._ Her face twisted into a look of horror as images of dozens of miniature Stitch- like creatures of different hues appeared in her imagination. _Pups._ Now the Stitch-esque creatures were demolishing her home. A bright orange one devoured her sofa in a single bite, a red furred one picked up the fridge and shook its contents loose into its stomach then took a bite out of the fridge, a magenta one hung onto the ceiling fan like a monkey on a tree branch while another two trailed toilet paper across the house even on the ceiling. Her daydream came to an abrupt end and she stomped back into the house in the direction of Jumba's makeshift lab in his second floor room. "Uh, Jumba can I ask you a few questions?" The obese Kweltikwan turned vaguely to the native Hawaiian woman more fixated on some oblong metallic object in his hands.

"Don't you be having to work soon?"

"Yeah, but this is life and death…well not death but if it's as bad as I think it could be I'd rather die." Jumba's puzzled look bade her to explain. "Okay, so while I wasn't home apparently Stitch got a girlfriend and well…I was wondering about…y'know?" She gestured wildly as the awkwardness of the discussion got to her and she couldn't bring herself to explicitly reference the sex life of an alien she couldn't quite unconsciously decide was a pet, an adopted brother, or a foster son to its father/mother/mad scientist progenitor.

"Tapeworms?" Nani shook her head she swaddled her arms under her belly. "Food supplies?" Nani let out a frustrated growl and formed a motion with her hands as of rocking a cradle. "Algourian folk dancing?"

"What? I don't… I'm talking about kids." Nani spat out. "What happens when all their lovey-dovey results in a pack of wild hoodlums with super strength?"

Jumba guffawed while Nani stared intently, "not to be worrying all experiments are infertile I am not so lacking in foresight as to actually give my creations the ability to procreate. Besides is better for them, all the fun none of the worry and poopy diapers!"

Nani's face fixed itself into an impassive stare as she digested the information…somehow it was everything she wanted to hear and exactly what she did not want to happen. "Do…do they know…about…?"

"No, I designed them to feel nothing but destructive impulses so it never mattered."

"But they **can** feel something other than destructive impulses."

"And what is point?"

Nani thought back to Stitch's doting affection and wondered how the two might react to that bit of news but it was cut quickly when she realized that she had been talking for ten minutes. "Well, see' ya' gotta go bye before the boss man gets angry." Jumba waved as well as he could with his current invention in progress in hand.

Lilo meanwhile was still looking forward to sleeping in, "well, Stitch I'm going back to-" Lilo glanced around the empty room in confusion, "wow, it's like being in love turned Stitch into a ninja." Lilo languidly stretched her arms and proceeded up to her room to return to the peace of sleep.

In direct contrast to everyone Stitch and Angel were energized for a new day. So much so they decided to the leave the house on their own- well Angel decided Stitch just followed her like a lovesick puppy. Holding hands was such a new experience for both of them: Angel would smile at the comforting, strong presence beside her and Stitch would blush at the attention. They wandered aimlessly for what place was more romantic and special for a first date than Kauai. Eventually they crossed paths with Dupe and Slushy making their rounds selling shaved ice. Sensing an opportunity Stitch placed an order but when Slushy stretched out his hand the flaw in his plan reared its ugly head, "eheheh, cousin yuuga suche ohana?"

Slushy was unmoved, "paying customers only".

Stitch looked at Angel, she wasn't particularly agitated but she did eye the desert as it was carried along by various passersby hungrily, while she wasn't looking he dropped to his knees and pleaded, "Please! Meega need only two of then never ask favor again!" Slushy was surprisingly warm hearted considering his element and relented after only a few moments of Stitch's puppy dog stare.

"Only once and you owe me favor big time." Slushy handed him two snow cones but they couldn't decide on a particular flavor for Angel so her particular snow cone was an obnoxiously bright, pastel rainbow with a black stripe representing soda. He sauntered behind Angel and tapped her right shoulder with one of his retractable arms. She turned around and cooed when the icy concoction came into focus she eagerly took a few licks and gave Stitch a small peck on the cheek for his efforts. Stitch was so enamored by the kiss he barely noticed that the top of his cone fell on the ground. Everything was so sublime nothing could take his focus away from the radiant beauty next to him and nothing could ruin the day.

"Ugh! Weirdlo's ugly dog has been multiplying or something." Correction-almost nothing could ruin his day but Mertle and her posse: Yuki, a dark, straight-haired Japanese girl; Elena a blonde, blue eyed girl with pigtails; and Teresa a curly haired brunette of Native Hawaiian descent – all of which Stitch was halfway convinced were either automatons or some strange gestalt pseudo-human – could spoil milk with their presence. Mertle stepped forward between Stitch and the shaved ice dispenser her posse following in almost lockstep. "At first I thought, 'I must be seeing things' because if it was you I would have smelled you before I saw you."

"Yeah!" Mertle's posse inanely shouted in unison- not unlike either a pre-programmed response or hive mind Stitch mentally noted. Absent-mindedly, Stitch crushed his frosty dessert in irritation.

"Eeuch! How can something so pink be so ugly?" Stitch looked toward Angel whose expression transformed from contentment to one that was utterly ineffable in a split second. Making like a rabid dog he used all four (well four of six if you don't count antennae and spines and 4 of eleven if you do) appendages to leap and bark at the irritants who screamed and fled in terror. His job well done and the day saved from callow, pestering brats he wrapped his left arm around Angel with a smug, serene smile plastered on his face.

"Ignore them, ika patookas from hula class." Angel didn't budge for a moment but before Stitch could worry too much about her state of mind she nestled against him and finished her rainbow plus soda snow cone.

Inevitably they returned home and the moment they did Angel darted to her room. Stitch was left confused but Lilo broke him out of his stupor, "there you are, Stitch, I was wondering if you'd be on time for Hula." Stitch was downcast, "don't worry, I'm sure Angel can come too."

"Ih!" Stitch took off so fast the rush of wind made the grass skirt rustle. Angel wasn't in her room, though, so a confused Stitch checked the upper floors. He finally found her in the room he shared with Lilo perusing their book of reformed cousins. "Boocheeboo!" Angel jumped and hurriedly hid the book as Stitch wrapped his arms around her waist. "Boocheeboo, hula time!"

Angel's mind raced to find an excuse but just settled on, "naga now, maybe meega see you there later?"

Stitch was downcast, "okay, the address should be on business card on fridge if you change your mind."

"Taka, see yuuga soon." Stitch unwound his arms from Angel's waist and slumped his way to Lilo. Angel retrieved the book labeled "cousins" from its hiding place. Resuming where she left off one particular experiment caught her eye, "bootifah!" her lips spread into an evil grin.

"Stitch, it really isn't that big a deal. So she isn't interested in hula now, I bet once she gets her first taste she'll be hooked for life and you two will have something special to share." After fifteen minutes waiting for Angel Stitch had practically given up hope she would appear. He was so preoccupied over Angel he muddled up his hula lessons and with one step right rather than one step left he hooked his foot on Lilo's. He realized something was off and attempted to correct. He hadn't realized, specifically, that his leg was interlinked with Lilo's and his sidestep back on course started a chain reaction: Lilo went toppling into Mertle, who toppled into Elena, who proceeded to knock over Yuki, whose futile attempt to use Teresa as a balance only succeeded in pushing Teresa down and the entire class was splayed out on the floor in a mere fifteen seconds.

"Weirdlo!" Came the screeching, grating voice of Mertle. "Could you please keep your dog from spacing out?"

"Yeah!" Stitch was not in the mood for Mertle's petty little insults and unthinkingly growled, aggressively walked over to the inane clown posse with such menace that they actively moved back. Stitch was impulsive but never so impulsive as to actually maliciously hurt someone. Fortunately, Mertle didn't know that so Stitch always counted it as a point in his favor that could always shut the bullies up with a meager bit of grandstanding and they were so weak and pathetically fearful they backed off every time…though there were occasions he fancied ideas revolving around more permanent solutions.

Unfortunately, hula instructor Moses was in about the same boat as Mertle when it came to predicting Stitch's actions. "Lilo, please get control of Stitch or send him outside before he hurts someone!" Not soon afterwards a stream of water landed on the back of Stitch's head and he flinched as the cold liquid made contact with his skin. He took the hint and grumbled under his breath. Suddenly, his mood lifted considerably as the slight sound of a very familiar song caressed his ears. **_Acoota chimeeto_** … ** _Igata no moota_** … a very, very familiar song. The warmth faded as the implications set in.

"Stitch are you okay?" Lilo asked. Stitch sniffed the air.

"We need hairspray." Lilo looked askance until a beige furball unceremoniously landed in the middle of the stage. It unfurled to reveal two big, seemingly pupil-less eyes, scissor like claws, and a pink bow tie. As if guided by a mysterious force it eagerly homed in on Mertle's head. The girl screamed and when Clip was finished with Mertle , she jumped on the head of Mertle's Japanese friend Yuki, Elena pulled Clip off completely perhaps with too much gusto as Clip went flying through the air and landed on Teresa. After a few snips Clip jumped off and cornered Elena.

"Stitch, we have to do something!" Lilo shouted.

"Ih! Definitely!" Stitch had a smile on his face ever since the shock of the events transpiring had passed. "Definitely do something… later." Lilo none too unamused by the situation herself nonetheless stared at Stitch, tapping her toe impatiently. "Oketaka." Stitch grumbled under his breath. Lilo ran to Mertle's backpack and procured a can of hairspray. Stitch jumped on Elena's shoulders and pried Clip off of her head only to miscalculate Clip's reach and end up with the lower half of his body fur missing. Stitch, embarrassed, accidentally dropped her in a bid to cover up his nether regions. Before his poorly thought out impulse could bear fruit a spritz of Lavender scented "Strong Hold" hair spray stopped Clip's rampage in its tracks.

Mertle and her posse were unharmed except for their hair. Mertle was completely bald, Teresa's long, flowing hair had been reduced to a buzz cut, Elena had only a single ponytail the rest of her hair missing, and Yuki was now sporting a Mohawk. Naturally, they freaked and ran straight to their homes in pure embarrassment. The peals of laughter guided Stitch (and Lilo following close behind naturally) to the pink, koala-esque culprit herself. Angel was guffawing so hard she occasionally paused for breaths between laughs and even the stern expressions of Stitch and Lilo couldn't dampen her mood. Seeing Stitch almost completely au natural (relative to his standards, anyway) stoked a fire in her mischievous heart. Ignoring his attempt at a glare she sidled next to him, smiled at him sweetly, and innocently wrapped her arm around his waist and pinched his right cheek. The shock made Stitch jump...approximately ten feet straight up. When Stitch made landing back on Terra Firma he was far too flustered to do anything but smile dumbly and blush. Angel pushed farther, "bootifah patooka, morcheeba!" Lilo sighed, she'd seen enough movies to know that she had to be the spoilsport…then again maybe just this once she could chalk it up to Mertle's karmic comeuppance.

"Well, since Moses cancelled hula practice maybe I can teach you a few basics. Would you like that, Angel?" Angel yawned purposefully her gesture of opening her mouth exaggeratingly prolonged until she noticed a slight, agitated tic in Lilo's wishful expression, "naga, beach time!" Angel took hold of Stitch's hand and together they made their way to the beach.

"Okay, maybe next time." But the lovebirds were already out of sight already.


	2. Look Like An Angel

**Devil in Disguise Part 2 Look like An Angel**

It wasn't a terribly long walk back home from the hula class but it was long enough for Lilo to ponder the events that took place; it wasn't exactly an evil or destructive thing (unless you were a follicle of hair or blue fur) Angel did just a mischievous prank Mertle had coming for a long time. Really the worst part was gonna be the time wasted returning Clip to her one true place and beating herself up for forgetting to take a picture of the aftermath…for posterity and totally not as blackmail. So maybe she would arrive at the beach a few minutes later than she had hoped that wasn't so bad and more than negated by all she had accomplished in making Stitch better behaved. Lilo opened the front door of her house while hefting Clip rolled into a ball in her left hand, "Pleakley can you take me to the salon I have to put Clip back in her one true place..." Pleakley was off in his own world though, gazing intently around the home and rubbing his chin in consternation. "Pleakley? Hello…Earth to Pleakley!" Pleakley still didn't respond and shuffled into the kitchen. Lilo, a little frustrated shouted, "Pleakley!"

Pleakley fumbled with a ceramic jar and a few plates after the shock forced him back to Earth but with a series of contortions that only someone without a spine could accomplish he managed to catch the dishes. "Sorry, Lilo, I just haven't been able to shake the feeling that something was off ever since I woke up and it's driving me crazy! Just let me do this one last thing and I swear I'll drive you wherever you want." Lilo grumbled and sat in a kitchen chair hefting Clip up on the top of the kitchen table while Pleakley studiously analyzed the kitchen. "Let's see the fridge is fine no bite marks, the dishes aren't broken, the oven door is still attached, the toaster still works…" Pleakley's eye lit up, "that's it!"

"What?"

"Nothing." At Lilo's further confusion Pleakley explained, "the kitchen is in full working order, the house is still clean, and nothing's out of place- except this palm tree branch how did I miss that?" Pleakley lifted the familiar branch Stitch was fanning Angel with earlier and tossed it outside. Pleakley turned to Lilo deadly serious, "Lilo, is the little monster feeling okay?"

"He's fine, just lovestruck."

"Is that contagious, because Jumba could really stand to contract a case of lovestruck. It's done wonders for Stitch's behavior."

"It's not a disease, it's just what you call someone who is so in love their mind shuts down but not enough to become a member of the undead."

"Well isn't that something, you know I had my doubts about Angel since I learned she was working for Gantu but I must say the prospect of having the delicious Earth delicacy known as 'toast' daily has won me over!"

Lilo let out an exasperated sigh, "you and Nani both, but I think she might not be good at all!"

"Hmmm…how so?"

"She played a mean prank on Mertle and her posse, that's evil!"

Pleakley scratched his head, "is this some other Mertle I am unfamiliar with or the same Mertle who calls you 'Wierdlo'?"

Lilo knew what was coming so she hung her head in defeat, "the same Mertle who calls me 'Wierdlo'."

"Well then, sounds less like evil and more like good old fashioned Earth karma. Now chin up, young lady, we're going to the salon."

The trip itself was uneventful but the revelations about Angel's effect on Stitch's behavior made Pleakley just as excited about Angel as it had for Nani. Naturally, this made the entire trip an exercise in patience for Lilo who spent almost every minute holding back the urge to stuff Clip down Pleakley's throat. Upon arrival at the salon they met an eerie silence. The ringing of a bell sounded as they entered the salon only to find it eerily empty. Lilo spoke, "hello we're here to return Clip." She was met with silence. "Is anyone there?"

In spite of his depth perception Pleakley was the first to spot something moving. He motioned for Lilo to follow. At the very far end corner of the salon they found a shivering mass. On further inspection it was a woman with a cerulean towel wrapped around her head curled into the fetal position. "What on Earth happened here, miss?"

The shivering mass spoke, "it was horrible! A pink thing walked into the store. I thought it was a dog…or a mutated koala but it wasn't. It spoke this strange eldritch language and pointed to Clip but I just wanted it out so I shouted for everyone to hear that pets were not allowed and then it happened."

Lilo and Pleakley leaned in to hear her story better. "Everything went black and when I had woken up I discovered that our magazines were gone, Clip was gone, and…and…" the shivering mass stood to full height and unraveled the towel around her hair, Pleakley promptly collapsed in shock, "IT GAVE ME A PERM!"

Lilo was substantially more nonplussed than Pleakley, "I don't get it."

The beaches of Kauai were some of the most beautiful vistas in the world. The surf washing up on the sand like the rhythm of the Earth's heartbeat and as the sun set it sometimes cast upon the sky beautiful hues of pink and red that cascaded from the sun like wildfire in the sky. Stitch of course, couldn't have cared less about the scenery for he was admiring another sight altogether that commanded his attention and stirred feelings, sensations he didn't know he had and that he couldn't quite understand. Finally, after a few minutes bent over Angel rose to her full height after setting up a lounge chair- "borrowed" from a not terribly attentive couple who obviously didn't need or want it since they just left it out in the open. I mean, really, who leaves a lounge chair alone on a beach? Stitch's attention no longer completely taken by the view he shook the cobwebs in his head loose and proceeded to recreate his artistic masterpiece from their first time on the beach, hoping she might actually notice it. Within a few seconds he built a 9 foot tall sand statue in the perfect likeness of Angel- or almost perfect anyway, darned antennae. Thinking on the issue he decided to apply a little spit and polish, mostly just spit. His saliva actually worked as a rather versatile adhesive for forming and attaching the antennae and even though by the time it was finally done Stitch was dehydrated he smiled in absolute satisfaction and pride. "Angel, yuuga gotta see this!" Angel removed her sunglasses- the tourists on Kauai were such litterbugs- and stepped forward. Contrary to Stitch's expectation she didn't squeal like a schoolgirl over the profound act of affection Stitch had lovingly crafted for her. She just stared impassively and as her reaction became less and less forthcoming Stitch's smile became less genuine and more desperate.

Finally, Angel examined her body as best she could from the front, from the side, and what she could see of back. Stitch became more and more confused as Angel looked herself over until finally Angel spoke what was on her mind, "am meega really that fat?" Stitch panicked, now his plastered on smile turned into a fearful frown and beads of fearful sweat rolled down his temples. Stitch was new to Earth and dating but not so new as to not recognize one of the many questions that could induce murderous rage in a woman if answered incorrectly. Fortunately he had acquired a few pointers from David- or rather watching David foul up his attempts to woo Nani.

"Naga fabba, gaba ask?" Angel stepped back toward the lounging chair that she rescued from abandonment and pulled out a somewhat ragged magazine with a picture of a women in a velvet, silken dress that was fancifully decorated with gems and wearing all manner of conspicuous jewelry- that one didn't have an excuse the moment she laid eyes on the blurbs on the cover about such subjects as "How To Win Your Man From His Momma", "How To Deal With Distrustful In-Laws", "How To Best Please Your Man", and assorted topics with a bizarre fixation with a "G-spot" she decided it simply must be relevant to her interests and a quick peek wouldn't hurt anyone. Angel flipped through the pages and after the seventh model even someone as inexperienced with the opposite sex as Stitch could see what the problem was. "This," Stitch grabbed the magazine, "trash. The women look like teenage boys, meega like women who look like women. Yuuga the most bootifah of all cou-", the word caught in his throat as he realized that "cousin" was somehow wrong and creepy and his mind raced for a more appropriate word, "women", Stitch settled hoping no Angel wouldn't dwell on it.

Angel smiled and gently slid her tongue over Stitch's forehead, "taka boocheeboo!"

"Whoah, little dude, did I just see that?" Stitch was shocked out of his Angel-induced stupor and turned to see a familiar native Hawaiian with dark hair and a penchant for surfing. David looked over Angel, "so who's this guy, long lost brother or something" a certain change came over Angel, Stitch noticed that the moment David said "guy" her face went impassive but unlike with Mertle it swiftly twisted itself into an expression of fury. Angel growled deeply, not the kind of growl that Stitch did to scare away Mertle before as an act, the kind of growl growl that said "I'm gonna maul you and defile your corpse in front of your loved ones" the moment Stitch saw her knees bend in preparation for a leap he quickly deduced the end result would turn David's face into a piece of abstract artwork and intercepted before Angel could finish her leap through the air just managing to tackle a confused and shocked David before the pink terror could use his innards to create a Picasso inspired work of art. As David tried to stand up he caught sight of Stitch holding Angel back with all four arms as she tried to get back into mauling range.

"Angel, stop! David is friend...ohana." Angel grumbled but relented and Stitch released his holds and retracted his second set of limbs. Stitch took two steps forward to introduce his boocheeboo (and provide cover if Angel's temper flared) and gestured to the pink experiment, "David, this Angel. She," Stitch emphasized that, "is meega boocheeboo."

David wasn't always quick to catch on but in his years attempting to woo Nani he had been forced to adapt quickly to realize when he made a _faux pas_ and he silently mouthed "ooh." "Well, Angel, I'm sorry. No hard feelings, right?"

Angel kicked and otherwise fidgeted with the sand at her feet in consternation but finally said, "apology accepted."

David turned to Stitch, "So, little blue guy, what's a 'boocheeboo'?"

Stitch tapped on his chin as he sorted through the various words of English he had only half heard from movies, television, music, and random small talk for a proper translated term, "is like precious thing, like girlfriend but more serious." Stitch fumbled with the words- English was somehow more complex and more inexact than Tantalog and that was the best way he could describe it.

"Man they grow up fast, you've only been here maybe a year and a half and you already got a girlfriend at this rate your gonna have kids by the time your three years old so only question here is how many you gonna go for?" David smirked as Stitch became flustered, a side that David had never seen before.

"Gleargh!" Not the most refined and charismatic response Stitch ever had to a question. The biological weapon of mass destruction and chaos blushed deep enough crimson for it to show through his fur as he turned his gaze downward and he fidgeted with the sand at his feet only able to mumble incoherently. Angel, sensing an opportunity strode up to Stitch with a lascivious smile. She grabbed hold of his left arm and tested its muscle mass, then analyzed his left ear by softly blowing into it causing it to twitch and Stitch to blush, walked behind Stitch and even though he had no way of knowing where she was looking his blush grew even deeper and even deeper still he felt her paw grab hold of his tail the shock sending him standing completely straight and upright and finally she finished the circle around him with an appraising look. Rubbing her chin thoughtfully she stated in the most blasé matter of fact way possible, "ten." Stitch was dumbfounded but David was howling in laughter and patted Stitch on the back in congratulations.

"Oh boy, real wild one you caught." David's expression softened and with disheartenment he said, "I remember when Nani was wild." Stitch piped up before the conversation could turn into uncomfortable silence.

"Where do babies come from?"

David smiled, "I think it'll be better as a surprise."

With that David towed his surf board back to the beckoning waves. By that time the distinctive sound of the X Buggy could be heard racing to reach its sandy destination. Stitch seeking to answer questions and happy to see Lilo pounced on the X Buggy as it came to a stop. Lilo wasn't able to get a word in about Angel before Stitch asked, "Lilo, where do babies come from?" Lilo looked to Pleakley who feigned a cough as he realized that both the little girl and the genetic experiment were looking to him for advice. Pleakley turned his gaze to his invisible wristwatch only detectable by one-eyed aliens put in a spectacularly awkward position, "oh look at the time my pot roast is going to be burnt to a crisp." He backed out and departed the beach or at least went far enough as to be certain that he was out of sight of the two whereupon he parked on the opposite end and strode over to the beach.

"Well, Stitch, I've always gotten mixed stories about it but I think it goes something like this: a stork steals an egg from chicken, squashes a bunch of bees into a paste and injects the paste into the egg which hatches into a baby." Stitch was completely unblinking. Lilo shrugged, "it's a work in progress. Anyway, has Angel seemed a little…evil lately?"

"Naga! Boocheeboo bootifah!" Stitch smiled…and didn't stop for almost five minutes until Lilo in an act of desperate concern shook him awake. Angel strode up to Stitch with a bounce in her step… up until she noticed a certain native Hawaiian girl in a sanguine mumu with a white leaf pattern. She only trudged after noticing that unwanted visitor. Her change in attitude only went completely unnoticed by Stitch. Lilo noticed it and eyed Angel's sunglasses suspiciously, "Angel, where did you get those glasses?"

Angel never once acknowledged Lilo's presence. "Boocheeboo, gabba ik." She gestured to the various natives riding the waves.

"Angel, it's rude to ignore someone when they are talking to you." Stitch also neglected to notice that Lilo existed until she pried him away from Angel's stare. "Stitch did Angel steal those glasses?" Regardless of their relative size and strength Stitch felt like he was lunch being fought over by two feuding predators but he felt compelled to answer the question honestly. He remembered walking along the beach with Angel and then she spotted a pair of sunglasses and when she bent down to pick them up Stitch's mind went completely blank for at least ten seconds and when the gap ended she was wearing a stylish pair of glasses. It was like that for a lot of events, actually. She would bend down, his mind would go blank and when she got up she would have some newly acquired bauble. Stitch was clever enough to use this to his advantage.

"Meega naga see Angel steal anything." Lilo gauged his body language and reluctantly accepted defeat while Angel hummed in triumph. Angel took this moment to reorient her boocheeboo to her question. "That's surfing" sensing an opportunity to impress Stitch laid it on thick, "meega the greatest surfer ever." That got an eye roll from Lilo.

"Would you take me surfing, Stitchie?" Naturally, Stitch's boasting backfired spectacularly having failed to remember that Angel didn't share his hydrophobia.

"O-of course, boocheeboo." Stitch said in a stilted manner.

"Umm…Stitch it's not a good idea to surf by yourself" Lilo interjected.

Stitch was close to taking the out until Angel piped up, "meega boocheeboo doesn't need your help. He's the greatest surfer ever." With that they walked back to the shore Stitch with frightful, pleading eyes that only Lilo saw."

Lilo sighed, "I guess I better get David and the lifeguard."

The two politely asked a young Hawaiian native for use of his surfboard. Said native was one of the relatives and friends of Moses present when Stitch tried to slice a pineapple with a chainsaw. With an uncannily girlish scream he fled at the sight of Stitch and the two decided that was just his way of letting people borrow his surfboard. Having procured the surfboard they proceeded to take wade in the water stich wavering momentarily as he stared into the blue void below. Off in the not too far distance Stitch his purple, rotund with an oversized bottom making waves. He shouted, "cousin can yuuga make only small waves." Cannonball nodded.

Angel, thinking this was just Stitch showing concern for her safety, shouted even louder, "Naga! Make them big!" Stitch gulped as once again his attempt to impress backfired. With a running leap and a pre-splash bounce Cannonball launched himself high into the air and with each meter he rose Stitch's heart sank deeper and deeper into his chest. At first the mass of water approaching looked only gigantic, upon further analysis it was actually enormous. Stitch gulped as the wave approached Angel holding onto his waist tightly. Soon it was upon them and by some miracle Stitch remained upright. Over the years he had accumulated some small instinctual understanding of surfing from watching David, Nani, and his own time on a surf board. His confidence soared as he moved through the water tunnel shifting slightly to and fore in a semi constant balancing act. On shore, David and Lilo were conversing, "maybe that rescue won't be so necessary after all, Lilo." In a fit of excitement Stitch roared and jumped. Unfortunately, with Angel holding onto him he couldn't quite rebalance the board and soon he felt the board slip away from his feet and almost every instinct in him but strangely he found that he was less worried about his own fate and preoccupied in this moment with Angel's well being. He kicked himself mentally for not realizing that he wasn't the only one danger, but by that time his head was already beneath the water. David and Lilo were themselves filled with worry, "Nevermind, Lilo, I'm on it." In the back of his head Stitch was only vaguely aware that someone was carrying him. Even as David was swimming out to the rescue Stitch was plopped down on the wet sand. Fur matted Angel managed a swift swim to shore, boocheeboo in arm. David promptly circled around to meet them. Angel started to perform CPR as Lilo arrived on the scene. She watched tensely as the moments passed by. Angel became more panicked as time wore on and resorted to mouth-to-mouth in a last desperate attempt. Lilo had never been so scared in her life…right up until she noticed that Stitch's eyes were opening and closing quite sneakily, "Angel, I d-" Stitch's arm shot right up and gestured for her to be silent. Lilo turned to David who must have noticed as well because he desperately holding back a grin. One more Angel attempted to give Stitch the breath of life and at last he made his move: he wrapped his arms around her head and held their lips together. After fussing and fidgeting around Angel finally made her escape upon which she gave him a smack so hard he almost stayed aloft for two whole seconds before coming down to Earth, "Stitch, ika patooka!" Angel stormed off in a huff and David took this moment to burst out laughing.

"You deserved that," Lilo stated matter of factly.

"Hey, you gotta respect the classics." David stated.

"Isn't this one of the reasons Nani chased you out of the house that one time?" David was about to reply but found he couldn't quite deny it. He returned to his business muttering to himself. "Stitch, maybe the next time you try emulating David's flirting method you should remember that David is…well David."

"Ih." Stitch agreed.

Stitch tiptoed to the target aware that any sudden movement or noise might set off the dangerous predator. Unfortunately, Angel's ear were just as big as his and he got a face full of sand for his trouble. Angel was still wearing sunglasses but somehow Stitch feel her glare. Fortunately, he came prepared with the ultimate weapon: chocolate. Angel unwrapped the bar without taking her eyes off Stitch but once she took a bite the sweet flavor of milk chocolate made her immanently more amicable. "Angel forgive Stitch?" Angel answered with a hug.

"Just ask for a kiss next time."

"Meega just being spontaneous." Thus their first fight ever was resolved. Before they could celebrate this radical new step forward for their relationship.

"That dog has my glasses!"

"And my chair! Wait! That's supposed to be a dog?"

The two were confronted by almost all the recent victims of Angel's pilfering…er "rescuing from inconsiderate owners". Lilo came running as soon as she heard the commotion. "Hey, I'm really sorry about my dog she's new and needs time to adjust. Sit, boy. Sit, girl" Stitch almost immediately adopted his pet dog cover but Angel refused to budge an inch. Lilo glanced over to Angel pleadingly for her to play along and eventually Angel got on all fours. "I hope you don't mind she's a very curious puppy," Angel gave Lilo a glare through her not so innocently procured sunglasses of such twisted hate Lilo backed away unconsciously, "and they're a very smart breed," Angel seemed mollified and eventually settled into a stoic expression. The items were returned and once the owners were gone Angel sourly marched back to the Pelekai household Stitch trailing along behind her. Beach time was unofficially over before Lilo could have any fun. "Angel you can still have fun on the beach without all that stuff." Angel turned up her nose. "Fine, I guess I'll get Pleakley to pick us up." When Pleakley showed up they were all left waiting for Angel to show up. Lilo was about to check on Cannonball but Angel appeared from seemingly nowhere the moment she took a footstep. Lilo eyed Angel suspiciously noting that her chest seemed to rising and falling rapidly. "so, Angel, where have you been?"

Angel seemed to pause for a short bit whether concocting a story or gathering her breath Lilo couldn't tell "little experiments room".

"For ten minutes?"

"Powdered my nose too."

"With what? Did you take something else?"

Pleakley interrupted, "sorry but we're wasting gas as it is so can you all please get in so we can go home?" Happy for the distraction and excuse to end the conversation Angel walked to the car her door opened by Stitch. Once she was in Stitch walked in…slamming the door right in front of Lilo.

"Sorry force of habit." Lilo climbed in leveling an unamused glare at Stitch who shrugged apologetically. The trip was filled with silence…if you ignored the giggling as Angel and Stitch flirted in their bizarre little language. Without warning Angel pulled out an umbrella in the X Buggy's floorboard. Confused Lilo was about to ask a question until she saw it, a massive tidal wave from the beach. It didn't quite reach the X Buggy but everyone who wasn't under the umbrella was soaked by water. Suddenly, with a loud thump a surfboard landed on the X Buggy. "Now THAT was an awesome wave." David wiped his brow and Angel left the X Buggy in the confusion and plucked from the detritus and debris carried by the wave a familiar set of sunglasses.


End file.
